Still offering sketch commissions for $5, send me a note if interested

I've been daydreaming a lot about the sort of art I'd like to receive I don't expect it, and no I'm not asking for it, but it's fun to dream about. I have a lot of ideas floating around in my head that I know are beyond my current skill level, some that might always be beyond me. Sometimes I just want to see what my characters or ideas would look like in another artist's style. Sometimes I just want to be an ass and see if I can provoke some sort of reaction by making reasonable requests but then using absolutely ridiculous characters.

I heckle artists on Gaia for commissions every so often. I've got a major quest running for a lot of older items, but between items I sometimes go for a commission or two, and I pop by contests for free art every now and then. I've gotten a lot of cute art on Gaia, but most of it is of my avatar.

I'm a little torn on what I'd ask for if I got more art. I have enough avatar art (though I certainly wouldn't turn away more)... I want more art of my characters. But I'm leaning away from anthros lately, and have very few human characters to ask for art of. Ah well.

Daydreaming is still fun

I'd rather have fun.

"Good enough" is good enough for me and I'm not ashamed of the fact that I enjoy doing things that other people can do better.

Speaking of which, my lazy ass is so damn busy this week.

Today I am baking four batches of cookies. Frosted sugar cookies for my sister & stepbrothers, and chocolate chip cookies for my mom. I've got portable containers for the cookies that need transporting and I'm going to hide all of them in my bedroom closet so that mom & sis don't try to get any pre-Christmas nibbling in.

Tomorrow I get to do grocery shopping. Then I'm baking peanut butter cookies for my dad & stepmom, and a chocolate cream pie for ~ClockworkValkyrie's family.

And Thursday, Christmas Eve as I'm sure y'all're aware, is going to be the busiest day of all. I'm going to be baking a cake and 24 cupcakes. Copious amounts of food coloring will be involved. The cake is going to be green & white marble cake with red frosting and green sprinkles. The cupcakes are going to be white, with either red frosting and green sprinkles or green frosting and red sprinkles.

Then Christmas Eve Mass - the one time I willingly attend church all year - and family dinner at a hibachi grill on the way back home. It's a hell of a conspicuous tradition, but when I say "on the way back home" I mean it. The restaurant is right on the road we take, and it's amazing.



_{I have to pick up butter today though because I need four sticks and only have three argh math why do you defy me}

*spritzes Emo-Away on her journal*

It's mah birfday!

It's also 6am so I can't think of shit to say, derp.

There are so many wonderful people I just wanna thank for no good reason and in no particular order~

~ClockworkValkyrie who has my heart wherever she goes

*2000man who won't stop spending money on me

=Eggplantm who always has time to respond to my comments

*gamera1985 who makes me curious without regretting

=whitetrashpalace who is pretty much always right about everything

=Bilious who is adorable

~Otaku42 who has the most glorious Jewfro ever

*falingard who puts up with my constant thieving of his geese

And everyone else involved in the *DeviantDead chatroom, who are wonderful

I'm... lonely.

Just lonely.

It drives me nuts. It's hardly like I'm isolated.

I have friends at school. And in two of my three classes, a classmate I'm not afraid to talk to.

But...

I dunno. I guess it's some weird sort of cabin fever.

And maybe some sort of agoraphobia. Is that the right word? I thought that it was fear of open spaces but I hear it used as fear of leaving the house entirely. Which certainly isn't true of me, but... I don't like going places, on my own. I don't like being separated from people and places I know.

I recover. From pretty much anything. But that doesn't make it any easier to face a situation that I'll need to "recover" from.

I see Stef almost every day now, because we go to school together. But I miss her, on weekends. My mother is away with my stepdad on weekends, and my little sister is away at school and almost never home even when she's in town.

I can only distract myself for so long. And books and candles don't help when all I want is to sleep and feel safe with somebody beside me.

Maybe if I had a job again this would all go away. Hell, I know most of it would. But I can't bring myself to put the effort I need to into finding a job, because it involves talking to strange people and going strange places.

I'm... lonely. Just lonely.

Yoinked from =Eggplantm

1- Be one of the first 10 people commenting on this journal entry and I will add you to The List.

2- For each of those 10 people I will put their avatar and link three to five deviations I like from their gallery on the list.

3- If I feature you, you'll have to do the same in your journal, putting me the the first spot, completing The List this way with 9 other people. Or add me to your existing 'get featured' journal.





















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